My official website is a dead zombie duck wandering the internet wasteland looking for brains and finding none, especially on facebook. This blog was started as a random drawing/story project about proto feminist yeh seemed like a good idea at the time. Now it is just a blog about my art in general with the occasional feminist zombie thrown in

Tuesday, 5 March 2013

Jasmine Tamara Darlington Whit was super mad keen on all things yoga. Yoga had changed her life, she just loved all that eastern philosophy tantric, karmic dream catching stuff. She'd even gone vegan and only ever drank green tea....and the occasional glass of red wine.

It was during such a relaxing yoga session when Jasmine was just about to salute the sun that a mass of blood thirsty zombies stormed in. Everyone was so relaxed and totally zen they didn't really react at first. The zombies didn't really know what to do either, they've never come across such a relaxing atmosphere and were far more used to people screaming and running. So when the screaming and running started they were very relieved and got down to the business of the biting and the disemboweling.

Jasmine's legs were all tangled up in the full lotus position so she didn't stand a chance of getting away. Three zombies descended on her and started chewing at her neck, Jasmine wasn't really too super mad keen on this and tried to get them off with a few stern ''shoo! shoos!'' this didn't really work and made her awfully cross. By this point she was feeling a little faint, which is probably for the best because shortly after passing out the zombies tore her head clean off! They didn't eat her all though, the zombies found she tasted far too much like tofu and, zombies aren't really too super mad keen on vegetarian food. So they left her and chased after the other women, who by this point were sprinting full pelt the hell out of there screaming bloody murder.

Jasmine soon turned into a zombie herself and was a little discombobulated to say the least, she could see her own headless body in front of her. On the plus side she noticed how super toned she looked, all that exercise had really paid off and then some. She managed to pick up her head and left to go pick up the kids from school and get dinner ready for the family. Once she'd finished eating the kids she got her yoga mat out in the drawing room and meditated on what she was going to do when her husband got home...

...Jasmine still loves yoga and likes to limber up with a few different positions every morning. The only thing that has changed with her yoga routine is that she now has a little yoga mat for her head. A few other things have changed in her life since turning into a zombie too, she's no longer vegetarian and is now widowed.

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